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  • Writer's pictureErin E. McEndree

Find Your Kindred Tribe

What is your speciality? Are you great at numbers? Are you a master crafter? Are you a talented singer or a love to paint? Is your passion homeschooling? Have you dealt with a divorce? Is your child estranged from the family? Have you lost a child or lost all your possessions in a fire?

What is your speciality that sets you apart? Do you know others who share in your circumstance or talent? Mine is being adopted. I have found several key elements in my upbringing that my parents instilled in me that helped me be secure, confident and realize I was exactly where I was supposed to be in history and time (Acts 17:26) to help lead others to the Lord.

Have you ever noticed that people who have not experienced the same circumstances you have, try as they might, they just can’t understand? I’m not saying people don’t try to listen and encourage. I’ve had many sweet ladies listen to my story, pray for me and encourage me. However, there is aways something missing. There is a deficit in their eyes that only knowledge with no personal experience of the circumstance cannot fill. Women who share my experience, even if the details are some different, have a deeper understanding and better feedback.

Who better to encourage those going through a divorce than someone on the other side of the divorce. They can pull you through. Who better to support those who have lost a child than someone who has lost a child. They can bolster your grief. Who better to help those struggling with all the negative emotions of adoption than someone who has been there and lives on the positive side of adoption. This is my God-anointed story He intends me to use to help others with similar experiences. I am looking for my kindred tribe. Who is yours?

I have been led to help adoptees overcome feelings of rejection and abandonment. I have a deep desire to tell adoptive parents what my parents did to help me feel secure, loved, wanted and accepted. I have been drawn to birthmothers to help them relinquish shame and guilt.

My aim is to help adoptees, adoptive parents and birth mothers focus on the blessings right in front of them and identify with what they are grateful for in spite of difficult circumstances.

So whether you flunked out of college and are now a successful business owner or a master chef or delicately merging two families gracefully, whatever your story, use it to help others along their life’s journey.

I have been tasked by God to write a book about my adoption experiences, but I truly believe it will help anyone who believes they are adopted by God through his Son and co-heirs with Christ. I’ve learned many adoption stories are heart breaking. Many do not turn out well for a slew of reasons. But I also know, if you look farther back than biology, let’s say over 2000 years, you can be confidence you are loved beyond measure, secure in your existence, hopeful in your future and created for a purpose.

Find and embrace your story and help others along the way. Volunteer to be a tutor. Help at a benevolence center. Pray with someone who has lost a parent like you. Find what connects you to others and reach out. Make your tribe bigger. Use your life to encourage others. Don’t waste your hardships allowing them to overtake you and keep you stuck. Overcome their negative control and use them for good. You are an overcomer! What is your story to share?



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