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  • Writer's pictureErin E. McEndree

Dwelling in the Adoption Triad Excerpt: Intro Page #1

I am excited to share what God has done in my life. Over the past few years I have been growing in confidence to share my adoption story. My story didn’t feel complete until recently because I needed time to make my story relevant in all three relationships of the adoption triad: adoptive parents, adoptees and birth mothers. Although my story is far from over, I want to share it with you in the hopes you may find hope, healing and peace in your life.


The Introduction #1 (I change it all the time and add new things.)

Adoption can be extremely difficult. There are hundreds of issues parents have to navigate and add an adopted child to the family and the number of issues goes up significantly. When parents keep secrets, don’t have good parenting skills to start with and fall prey to unattainable worldly standards, there is a good chance any child will feel mistrust, shame, neglect and fall into despair.

There are hundreds of issues children have to deal with and add being adopted and the intensity of these issues goes up dramatically. When lies of inadequacy, worthlessness and belonging are not countered with Truth, children naturally feed those lies. They have to be taught to believe the Truth and if the parents are lacking in parenting skills and knowledge of the Truth themselves, children will feed temporary fixes like bad relationships, addictions or self destructive behaviors. As Julia Roberts character, Vivian, said in Pretty Woman, “The bad stuff is easier to believe.” It is a fact that negativity damages the brains capacity for positive. (More in chapter #)

There are hundreds of issues birth mothers have to overcome. The secrecy, the guilt and isolation. When not dealt with in a support system, the embers glow deep in the heart along with a fear that at any moment a brisk breeze of revelation will ignite a fire. It can consume relationships, breaks trust and change the makeup of a family forever.

Purpose for this book is for 3-fold:

* Give hope to adoptive parents by encouraging them to instill their traditions and heritage as they build an unshakeable foundation so their child can counter feelings of abandonment, rejection and uncertainty.

* Offer healing to adoptees by inspiring them to educate others about adoption issues instead of allowing triggers to develop that cause anger and resentment.

* Cultivate peace in birth mothers by helping them look at the larger purpose and discern personal growth from their circumstances.


If you know anyone who could benefit from my adoption journey, share this with them. I would love to connect and answer any questions. My website is You can also sign up for my Purpose Periodicals and the blog will be sent directly to your inbox.



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