Erin E. McEndree
National Adoption Day, Nov 20th
This can be for the ADOPTEE. This can be the day to focus on “whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”
Philippians 4:8. I realize every person will not fit into this category and that is why my Adoption Reimagined logo does not have intertwining hearts. (see maroon logo with triangle). The three of us are ever connected, but for some, a relationship is not the best thing mentally or emotionally or spiritually. (The hearts in my story DO intertwine. I am blessed beyond measure that my mom&dad and my birth mother & her husband can be together at family events.) My best tip, Focus on God. He never leaves, abandons and always comforts and heals… always, but “ it takes work on your part to participate in your own healing”. (That was a quote from one of my clients.
BEST TIP: Focus on God. He never leaves, abandons and he alway comforts.
This day can be for ADOPTIVE PARENTS. This can be the day to love and thank God for your children. (No matter where they are or what they have done.) It can be a day to pray for them and remember the joyful times. There is much pain and longing when when one cannot conceive. Remember: “He settles the childless woman in her home as a happy mother of children. Praise the Lord.”Psalm 113:9
BEST TIP: Tell stories and don't keep secrets.
There are other reasons for adoption, also. I understand that. My best tip: tell the family stories over and over and help your child feel like these are their stories. It’s much easier to learn from past generations than something you know Zero about. I have some of the best stories and one was turned into a movie!! Thank you, mom, dad, aunts, uncles for immersing me in our heritage. I truly believe, “From one man he made all the nations, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he marked out their appointed times in history and the boundaries of their lands. God did this so that they would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from any one of us.”
Acts 17:26-27 And, thank you for not keeping it a secret, but for making being adopted part of my story.
This day can be for BIRTH MOTHERS. It was the hardest thing you ever had to do. And even if you were content, it was always in the back of your mind. Some chose. Some had no choice and no voice. Either way, healing had to take place. Maybe it was guilt, anger and loss your heart needed to mend from. My best advice: forgive much, lavish grace and serve others. When you look outward and see the needs of others, you heal as well. “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23 Whether you are in relationship or not, have trust, faith and hope.
BEST TIP: Forgive much, lavish grace and serve others.
We can ALL use our experience to educate. We can ALL use our journey to make us closer to God. We can ALL show grace and forgiveness and love. And that does not always mean be in a relationship either.
I hope this HAS educated those who love US who are not adopted. You have a godly responsibility to show compassion, grace and empathy as well.
Contact me if you struggle with the agony of adoption and need to talk!